Day 5: Church

I haven't realized how important it is to feel like you "belong" until I started attending my most recent church. I grew up with this congregation, and even though I have been away for several years, people treat me as though I never left. Which one might consider a good thing- but in this instance it isn't. Several of the families I grew up with have left and there aren't many women my age to converse with. Those that probably could extend a hand of fellowship toward me, don't for whatever reason. I very seldom get a "hello" or a genuine "how are you?". If people do approach me to say hello it is either "business" related, or they can't help but come over to see my adorable little girl. I know that as a co-dependent I naturally struggle with the idea of feeling comfortable at church just because of supposed worthiness issues- it's even worse when I don't feel welcomed by my fellow congregants. I long to feel needed in a church capacity. Even though my therapist has said that this feeling has will be an hindrance in my journey to detach.